Well, i didn't want to tell anyone outside the clique cause i was scare i would jinx it but now that i think about. when i really need someone outside of my ite clique to confide to i find it very hard to approach anyone. the reason i didn't want to tell any of my ite friends cause i just want to talk to someone who doesn't go to the same campus as me and doesn't know the situation. an outsider. i really want their input. thats cause of the recent event. im really in a mess but i try to put a normal happy face cause i donno what else to act. so much has happen and its only february. i still have 4 more months to go before im free of maths class, all those modules and the school ccas. but by then another problem will surface; industrial attachment, every working day and you might get to be in the same company as your friends. all alone in a new environment, no friends on the first day to talk for 9 hours don't know doing what odd jobs. and i will be too tired to go out on weekends and stuff, cant manage time and stuff. by then too i would have turn eighteen. pretty weird. i don't usually this far ahead. haha. maybe cause i believe some where in the plan there's always a slight hiccup or change of plans/interest. hopefully the relationship will last long.

Do you know why i give up sometimes?

- either i find it useless to carry on or;

- im afraid to try so thats why i choose the easy way out.

coward right? i know. but thats what i feel sometimes. bet you didnt know that about right? haha.

im super random right this post but hey i cant say the full story out loud cause i dont dare to. maybe someday i will )

melshh!!